by Iolana Paedelt
things that are lost,
things that once were.
does it matter?
does it matter when the darkness comes?
does it matter when the world burns brighter
than any star’s flame and grey ashes
cover the sky?
can we rise?
out of dark vastness.
are we strong enough?
to ever live through meaninglessness.
when I left, you cried
and with every tear you spilled,
a piece of my heart died.
I have lost you
before I could even lose myself
and it pains me because I never knew what I
was like
but I knew you
and your love —
now, you’re gone, I’m gone.
it is all nothing but a fever dream.
so, does it matter?
does anything really matter when I am trapped
in this place behind the stars?
I can see you dancing on rays of moonlight,
slowly I reach out my hand
— jupiter rises in the morning light —
you’re too far away from me.
ashes, carry my world to him.
as I burn bright
I whisper your name.
ashes, carry my love
my goodbyes
and my sorrows,
for I am free as fire kisses my skin.
the moon turns red,
earth forgets about him in a sky of black.
beautifully broken hearts?
pile up,
trying to wake up a new world
without us.
does anything matter before if it all turns to
dust?
the only thing that ever lasts is death.
kiss me goodbye one last time,
look into my eyes and tell me you love me.
so that the universe is at its place,
until your grasp loosens and your hand slides
away
— I never wanted to let you go —
tall walls protecting our worlds collapse and
bury all that was and will be.
so, does anything matter?
or is it just the falling dust in my lungs as I take
my last breath
that makes everything seem so clear?
if you see the falling star tonight,
think of me.
think of me.
Iolana Paedelt is a German writer and poet. Their short stories and poems have been published in anthologies and magazines, both online and in print. On Twitter @therealpaedelt. On Instagram @therealpaedelt. Their website is iolanapaedelt.wixsite.com/iolana-paedelt.
