by Molly McGill
Important: Content warnings for this novella include graphic depictions of violence and gore, abusive / unhealthy relationships, animal abuse, and cannibalism. Please keep this in mind.
This novella is a strong start for my reviews of female-written horror.
Tantlinger uses her roots in poetry to form an evocative narrative with grotesque imagery throughout, exploring the fascinating thought processes of an unhealthy mind. The horrors in this book are disturbingly tangible for the reader as we are so close to the disturbing thoughts and descent into a mania that our protagonist struggles with.
Andi, our protagonist, is a traumatised woman who struggles to acclimate herself with the unfamiliar Doctor Fawning after the death of her previous therapist. All the while, her unhealthy attachment to her girlfriend Luna slowly starts to put strain on their romance and Andi starts to find comfort in the kettle of vultures that surround her home.
We follow Andi as she starts to battle with disturbing intrusive thoughts about eating carrion and becoming a vulture herself, among whom she believes she will finally feel comfort in her own skin.
“Freedom is all I want, to shift my spine and shoulder blades tectonic plates and grow wings instead. Fly, fly away…”
“The body is never wrong for them. They devour it. They just eat.”
Minor Spoilers ahead
The main draw for me when reading this novella was the intricacies of the characters and their dynamics with each other.
We open with our protagonist Andi describing the kettle of turkey vultures that later become her grim obsession.
“They won’t stop circling the trees; those poor, ugly bastardized versions of birds… it’s easy to picture their bald, red heads and ivory beaks spearing into the bloated body of a cow or whatever else decays in the woods.”
Andi leaves her girlfriend, Luna, sleeping in bed and ventures into the basement where Tantlinger first hints at Andi’s more disturbing fixations. Andi created a pair of wings out of dead Luna moths that she raised herself, with the intent of gifting the wings to her own Luna.
“They are still so striking. Almost as beautiful as my Luna”
Tantlinger artfully introduces the reader to Andi’s more violent urges here. Andi is very hurt and angry when Luna reacts negatively to the gift, cannot understand why Luna finds the wings so disturbing and has to fight against the urge to act on her more ‘wrathful’ thoughts, an ominous foreshadowing for the reader.
“My teeth clamp around the insides of my cheeks, as if I can gnaw and bleed away the hurt of her refusal.”
We later learn that Luna left her husband Malik to be with Andi and therefore is more likely to brush off some of Andi’s more macabre ‘quirks’ in an attempt to make the relationship work. The implication here is that Luna does not want to have broken up her marriage for nothing. Luna instigated the divorce after kissing Andi, with little evidence that their marriage was having significant issues beforehand
“The divorce paperwork had already been in a slow process for their disintegrating marriage. At least that’s what I like to tell myself.”
Tantlinger establishes an uneven power dynamic in Andi and Luna’s relationship. The reader initially believes that Andi’s devotion to Luna makes her the more vulnerable one in the relationship, however this is not the case. Luna apologises to Andi constantly for rejecting her wings, even though they disturbed her, and feels insecure that Andi does not open up to her as she does her therapist. Furthermore, it later becomes clear that Luna’s feelings and boundaries are often disregarded in favour of Andi’s.
For example, Andi disappears and refuses to contact Luna for two weeks. When Andi returns, she pressures Luna to have sex with her while on her period, despite Luna initially refusing her advances.
“She sighs and squirms away from my reaching hands. ‘I can’t right now Andi. You know…’ I know, but I don’t care. Never have.”
The partner that has the lesser say in the relationship is evidently Luna. Andi can wear Luna down to get what she wants.
“I roll my eyes, spurring her on. ‘I know, but hey it’s fine. My tough Luna, scared of her own blood.’ She crosses her arms, but I know the glint in her eyes. I know what hunger looks like.”
My fascination with the characters and dynamics that Tantlinger crafts in To Be Devoured stems from the way that they contribute to the mounting tension of the story. The degradation of Andi and Luna’s relationship drives Andi further into the clutches of her delusions as the narrative progresses. Tantlinger ultimately leaves the reader drowning in the slow boil of mounting tension before culminating in a grotesque and horrifying sequence of events where Andi gives in to her twisted urges.
“I chew and chew at what gurgles out of the spread open body, wishing my incisors and canines were all razor-sharp fangs. A piranha mouth to devour my sinewy prize.”
Andi is determined to be accepted among the carrion-feasting vultures leaving the last fragments of her humanity in the bloody carcasses left in her wake.
“I will be welcomed into their wake and we can all feast together on the body like a family. Bodies consuming bodies, nothing more.”
If you are a fan of body horror, and aren’t squeamish, I would recommend you check out To Be Devoured. Despite the brevity of this horror tale, the story and characters will stick with the reader for a long time. However, this novella is not for the faint of heart, so please use discretion and mind the content warnings before checking this one out!
Descendants of Brigid is a monthly column focusing on femme voices in horror literature & queer retellings of classic stories. The column is written by Sage Cigarettes Associate Editor Molly McGill, mmcgill@sagecigarettes.com.
Molly McGill (She/her) is a writer from Country Derry in Ireland. She specialises in short horror fiction and folklore influenced work. Molly joined Sage Cigarettes Magazine as an Associate Editor after graduating from John Moores University in Liverpool studying Film Studies and Creative Writing joint Hons. You can find her on twitter @Night_TimeTea.
